Winter Darkness

We’ve turned the clocks back to Daylight Savings Time, and I hate it! I used to love winter’s crisp, sparkling snow and glittering magic, but now I feel like I should be a bear and hunker down into a den for the next 4 or 5 months. It’s just too dark. My house seems dark and my office at work seems dark. I think a lot of it is just a reflection of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). I want light and warm sunshine in my life. These gray, rainy days knowing that snow is right around the corner are hard to take.

I think having PTSD makes every other condition you have worse. Now, not only am I coping with the PTSD, I am aware of how it impacts my SAD too, and how the SAD affects my PTSD. I feel out of step with myself, and it’s a daily effort to keep from sinking into despair.

When days like this occur, I have to watch that I don’t wallow in self-pity and focus instead on moving ahead. Winter will end; I have to remember that. Sunny days will come again, and so will happier times. Until then, I have to make an effort to find the sunshine in the little things. As the old adage goes, “The best way out is through.”

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